Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Good beer ad



The Aussies seem to have the kind of fun with beer ads that we Brits used to have twenty years ago. VB have a heritage of 
making big budget commercials. I know they don't always get 
people to drink more beer, but this one has some beautifully 
observed moments in it, is full of beery irreverence and makes 
the important point that beer unites us all in an entertaining 
way.

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Binge drinking horror - they're at it again

The Sun is concerned that Britain's teenagers are drinking themselves to death.  There are some disturbing statistics out there about underage drinkers, though the bit everyone seems not to be able to see is the FACT that the numbers of underage people who are drinking is FALLING. (Thanks to BLTP for pointing out the BBC's hilariously bad, unprofessional scaremongering on this dreadful news, complete with picture of youngster grimly drinking themselves to death on beer).

But The Sun wants to stop this... um... declining problem, before it's too late.  And what do they illustrate this story with?  Go on, guess.  Yep, a pint of real ale being handed over at that well-known underage drinkers' hangout, the Great British Beer Festival...

Thursday, July 02, 2009

H&G Update

The initial launch may have settled down but I'm continuing to flog my new book up and down the country.

If you're going to the White Horse American Beer Festival, I'm there tomorrow all afternoon, signing books and chatting from around 5pm.

The following day I'm back in Burton-on-Trent, signing in Waterstone's in town from noon for about two hours.

Then, next week I'm at the Derby Beer Festival opening reception on Wednesday 8th, and am giving a reading the following day at Sheffield's fantastic Devonshire Cat pub.

reviews are now also starting to trickle in slowly, and people seem to like it!  The Times calls it "big beery fun", and the London Review of Books claims it's "as enlightening as it is entertaining."  Both reviews are short and sweet - for a bit more depth, check out ATJ, Semi-Dweller, and an epic four-parter from Alan McCleod!

Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Where not to go in Corfe Castle

I dunno... should the profusion of chalk boards have given it away?

I don't do that many pub reviews on this blog, but whenever I'm either amazed or appalled by a pub experience, I feel a duty to share it.

Sadly, the appalling experiences seem to be winning at the moment, though I do have an amazing one I'm way overdue writing up.

Was on the Isle of Purbeck around Swanage at the weekend for a friend's 40th.  We visited Corfe Castle, actually an idyllic National Trust tourist trap village sitting in the shadow of said ruined castle. A brilliant model village was terrorised by Captain.  It was a model of the village we were in, and sure enough, on the model we could find our location and there was a tiny model village, and inside that, at the same spot, was a microscopic model village, and that made me wonder whether we were in fact inside a giant model village ourselves, with someone looking down on us...

So anyway, metaphysically confused, we skipped the (fantastic looking) cream tea and went straight to the pub for lunch.

Now, you're going to get all wise on me and ask me what I expected, going to an old stone-built pub in the middle of a touristy village owned by the National Trust.  Well, I was expecting something roughly equivalent to what you get in, say, a Nicholson's pub in the West End of London - indifferent, little atmosphere, nothing very inspiring, mildly overpriced, but perfectly OK quality and not that much you could actually complain about, and every now and again you get one that for some reason is actually quite brilliant.

The Bankes Arms Hotel, on the other hand, cynically takes the piss, knowing that only tourists drink there, so it doesn't matter if you leave feeling angry, ripped off, and probably still hungry.

The beer was fine actually - a couple of brews from local brewery Ringwood, which were perfectly well-kept.  But alarm bells should have rung when the only wine available was in little 175ml bottles - one red, one white, one rose.  Mrs PBBB had the rose.  It tasted of petrol.  

Undaunted, we ordered food. 
 
You may think it's impressive that three different meals could be served just five minutes after ordering, on a busy Sunday lunch time.  I don't - you can't cook three meals in five minutes.

BLTP's crab sandwich cost £8.  The bread was stale.

Mrs PBBB had a Sunday roast for £9 which was quite clearly a packet/boil in the bag affair.  This meat had not been cooked or carved on the premises - and maybe not even that year - and the vegetables were a mushy mess.

But I made the biggest screw-up: as we were on the coast I went for one of the seafood specials.  The scallops were utterly tasteless and served up in so much butter I felt sick after eating.  The chips they came with were dry, hollow, oven chips.  And the salad was drenched in so much cheap, sweet, bottled French Dressing it was utterly inedible.  And what did I pay for this?  £17.  Seventeen.  Fucking.  Pounds.  That's more expensive than half of the main courses at J Sheekey's, one of the most famous fish restaurants in the world, in Covent Garden.

One of the most grimly satisfying aspects of being in the privileged position where people actually read this blog is having the chance to name and shame those who are an insult to the pub industry.  Do go to Corfe Castle, it's lovely.  But don't go to the Bankes Arms Hotel.  And do feel free to point to this blog as the reason why.

Oh yes, the other place to avoid - the Ginger Pop shop is an Enid Blyton themed shop that sounds just about perfect.  I desperately wanted to go in, until BLTP showed me the photos he'd taken of the window display... featuring golliwogs.  Even the Blyton estate have removed golliwogs from her books, recognising that they belonged to an earlier, less enlightened age.  The only other people I know still selling golliwogs are the racist BNP.  Go figure.

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Feeling privileged...

... because I was recently asked to name a new beer!  Seaforth is the latest release fromThornbridge, an 'English' India Pale Ale. 
This is blue and the text doesn't look weird until I post it here.  
I've no idea why blogger has had a go at changing the design.

What this means is that it's similar to Jaipur, but brewed with 100% English ingredients, making it much closer to what the early nineteenth century IPAs would have been like.  I haven't had chance to taste it yet, but it's dry-hopped, darker than many IPAs, and very hoppy, according to head brewer Stef.  I can't wait to try it.

Why Seaforth?  Well, it sounds like a good name for an IPA, doesn't it? BUt it has a very special place in IPA's history.

Anyone who's read J Stevenson Bushnan's 1853 book 'Burton and its Bitter Beer' will know that the two ships that transported the first cargo of Samuel Allsopp's India Ale from Liverpool to Calcutta were the Bencoolen and the Seaforth.  The Seaforth arrived a few weeks after the Bencoolen, so what makes it special?

Well, when I was in the Indian National Library in Calcutta, I found the edition of the Calcutta Gazette from 1823, around the time these ships arrived.  At that time, London brewer George Hodgson dominated the Indian market and was restricting supply to maximise his profit, refusing credit terms to everyone, and generally pissing off the most powerful corporation the world has ever known.  The cargo of Allsopp's ale that arrived on the Bencoolen sold for about two thirds of what Hodgson's did, such was his reputation, and on that basis Allsopp would have failed - and that would have meant no Burton IPA.  But one of the ads around the arrival of the Seaforth reveal an extraordinary stroke of luck:

REJECTED BEER
To be sold by Public Auction, by Messrs Taylor & Co, on the CUSTOM HOUSE WHARF, by permission of the Collector of Sea Customs, at eleven o’ Clock precisely, on Saturday next, the 28th Instant, 48 HOGSHEADS of Hodgson’s BEER, and 17 empty HOGSHEADS, landed from the ship Timandra, and 30 hogsheads of Hodgson’s BEER, landed from the ship Seaforth. 

Hodgson had sent out a dodgy batch of beer on the same ship as Allsopp's second consignment, which had arrived in perfect condition.  This allowed Allsopp to get into the market, and the consignment on the Seaforth sold for double that on the Bencoolen.  People then tasted IPA brewed in Burton for the first time, realised how superior it was to London IPA, and the rest is history.  You can read that history in Hops and Glory of course.  

So what better name for an English IPA brewed just up the road from Burton? 

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Beer and marketing

I didn't mean to sound too critical of the multinational I mentioned yesterday - it's what I expected them to do.  At that scale, it is about branding first, brewing second.  And when your brewing all takes place inside shiny sealed closed tanks and happens at the push of a button, there's not so much you can talk about anyway. Small brewers undoubtedly have an advantage when there's a sense of a guy who brews the beer, who has a sort of marriage to it, and who can show you the insides of how it's made if you talk to him or, even better, visit his brewery.

But many small brewers often go too far the other way and seemingly reject marketing as somehow evil.  I've - hopefully - recently worked my last day inside an ad agency because a great deal of what I had to do there made me feel dirty.  It wasn't the process, the craft of marketing itself that was the problem - it was the kind of people it attracted, what they will do to get on, and what we were all obliged to do when unpleasant companies gave us the money that paid our frozen salaries and Martin Sorrell's £60m bonus.

Sorry, this is going to turn into another long post - too much pent up blogging over the last few weeks!

If you take the tools of marketing and use them in a good way, they're not evil.  Marketing does coerce people, but 90% of the time it does so with their consent.  People are marketing-savvy, and choose to either play the game or not.  And we live in a branded age - it's simply how things work.  If you choose not to play, you go invisible, or look very dated and stuffy.

When I first started writing about beer, I was really pissed off with CAMRA in this respect. Prominent CAMRA members frequently wrote about how people only drank lager because they had been brainwashed by big brewers with shiny ads.  What an insulting, snobbish, elitist thing to say - "you proles have no individual will, and you are too weak to resist this mass social conditioning - whereas I am immune to it, because in some way, I am cleverer than the masses."  And by refusing to play the marketing game, standing outside it, these people by default made CAMRA seem like a very stuffy, geeky organisation filled with the kind of people you wouldn't want to associate or be identified with.

I've learned a lot about CAMRA over the last six or seven years. The organisation is modernising itself and learning to play the game, and at central office at least, there are people who are forward looking, PR-savvy, and are very effective at engaging with the broader world.  I've also learned that CAMRA is a loose umbrella that holds many divergent opinions.  The vast majority of members are ordinary, decent people who really like good cask ale and - gasp - occasionally, on the hot day, might have a pint of Heineken instead.  But I have also met a great many hardcore nutters who clearly wear tinfoil hats when they're not releasing vile silent-but-deadly farts as they raise their personalised pewter tankards at beer festivals. You still hear these people saying lager is evil, that people who drink it are stupid, neither realising nor caring that they are actively discouraging new converts to cask ale by their appearance and behaviour.  It's fantastic that CAMRA membership is about to break the 100,000 barrier.  But in the context that there are 7 million regular cask ale drinkers in the UK, it's obvious many still feel the organisation doesn't represent them.

(My only remaining gripe with CAMRA central on this score is that the weird, unpleasant anthropomorphic people with pints growing out of their heads is a long way past its sell-by date.)  

This is all a hideously overlong and rambling prelude to saying, 'Hurrah!  The SIBA Business Awards are back!'  SIBA is a trade body for small and independent brewers in the UK.  The vast majority of the beer these brewers make is cask ale.  It could very easily have become like CAMRA of old, a fogeyish trade body mirroring the consumer movement.  But it hasn't. Big brewers want to join SIBA.  It's rapidly becoming seen by many as the major voice for the brewing industry.  And while they celebrate great brewing at their annual conference, as of course they should, the business awards celebrate best support of customers, best use of PR, best use of new media, best packaging, best launch etc.  

What these awards demonstrate is that effective marketing doesn't require the multi-million pound budgets of the big four multinationals who dominate the British market.  I write regular features for the Brewers Guardian showing how tools like great label design, viral marketing and effective use of PR can be done by any brewer of any size with a little effort and time.

People like Stonch have blogged consistently about how depressing it is to see beers with names like 'Old Pisshead' or pump clips featuring scantily clad women.  It makes the whole industry, and the people who drink their products, look like twelve year-olds.  On the other hand, look at Thornbridge, Brew Dog, Wye Valley, Otley.  Brew Dog may be loved mainly for the bravery of its brews, and Thornbridge also brew beers that, as they say, are 'never ordinary'.  But all four of these breweries give as much love and attention to creating modern, contemporary design - design that's bringing in new people to try their beers.  They are all experiencing soaring sales.

So if you're a brewer and you're not entering the SIBA Business Awards, you need to ask yourself why. If the multinationals spend more time thinking about marketing than brewing, it's because it works for them.  There are only a few breweries who are excellent at both brewing and branding.  And look how they take off when both are great. 

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

An interesting observation

Another thing keeping me busy is that I'm writing up thirty beers for a new coffee table book on great beers from around the world.  This involves phoning the brewery to check a few facts and see if there are any nuggets of trivia that will make my (very late) copy more interesting.

Every small to medium sized brewery I have approached has referred me to the brewer. Whereas tomorrow I'm talking to a large multinational brewery tomorrow, and they've put me on to the brand marketing team.

I've got nothing against beer marketers.  They pay me more to talk to them than publishers pay me for my books.

But I just thought the contrast was quite telling.